CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE - EPISODE 5

I'm Kate Wilder and today I'm going to do something a little bit different. I'm going to share some deep truths on how I changed my mind to change my life and to change my reality during the darkest moments of my life. And I arose not only a survivor, but a thriver with more knowledge, more tactics, more curiosity, more courage, more interest in everything life has to offer, and I'm ready to share with you. Now, I learned to change the way I think, to create something new through both good and bad times. I didn't pick up the wisdom I'm dishing out on my YouTube channel or podcast or in my writings from a self help book. Changing my mind to change my life. And to learn to manifest wasn't a concept I stumbled upon. It was a journey I embarked on early in life. Maybe didn't quite know it then, but because I had to learn to rescue my own self time and time again, while I navigated through a maze of tragedies to come. And they actually continued a relentless pursuit of taking down my very soul. I promise this will be an honest and positive podcast, but I am going to walk you through some muck. If you, yourself, or you know somebody who's been through some situations that are really bad in life, really scary. tHis podcast is for you. I'm going to tell you some tips that I used, and tricks I used to literally stay alive and survive. These situations have turned out to serve a higher purpose, and perhaps you can relate. Now don't get me wrong, this isn't a pity party, it's a roadmap to kickstarting some serious positive change. Opening up about this stuff is pretty difficult for me, even though it might not look like it. While your situation might be different, the human condition remains the same for all of us. We all face the choice, though, to give up after a bad event, don't we? Or to fight for a new and better day. Why I can say that to change my mind changed my life, well, it's actually more than that. Changing my thoughts actually saved my life, and I'm actually not kidding. Picture this kinda like a phoenix rising from the ashes that we hear about. That's the vibe I want to share with you. Whether you stumbled upon this video while grappling with life's harshest realities, or you're seeking a shot at positivity to conquer procrastination, to battle low self esteem, or face your fears head on, I've got your back. Now, I'm not laying out my whole life story here, I'm just giving you a sneak peek to set the stage for challenges I've faced and how I tackled them. and emerged even better for the wear. To put this in context, in a level, there were years of my life when my actual personal safety was at risk and I was actually sworn to secrecy or run the risk of being murdered. This is true. These times were serious, and pretty frightening, and events that happened are kind of the stuff of horror film. I wouldn't want or wish on anyone. I'm not talking about like one or two events of life, but More than a couple dozen, is all I can say right now. You know, the role model I had, my older sister, turned out to be a disaster. God love her. Her drug addiction, which started when I was in fourth grade, and she was in eighth grade, wreaked havoc on my life, causing such major traumas and life threatening events. You can't imagine. Thanks to the dangerous company she kept. So, I can only give you a glimpse, but let me just say, I consider myself lucky to be alive today. I've had to pick myself up after every incident over almost a 30 year span. It's so much too personal and you wouldn't want to hear it all anyway to dive into those details, but between those dark moments and later suicide deaths of my brother and ultimately that very same sister too. And then my boyfriend's death, all, just a little over a year after my sister. And more. I've kind of been through the ringer. Oh, you know what? Let me just mention this. My marriage and divorce, you know, that was actually a minor blip on my grief radar. The real challenges and battles I faced ran much deeper and resonated for far longer. So here's my take on traumas and traumatic experiences and manifesting change in your life. You know, it is not always about the bad things that happen. And people say, oh, it's about how you react to it. No, I want to say this. It's actually about how I carry them afterward, the dignity I can reclaim, creating a new vision of myself in a new life, and where that trauma fits into the grand tapestry of my life on a spiritual level. I just said a mouthful there, but let me continue. And maybe you can relate. After each bad event, healing for me hinged on certain questions that I had to ask myself. You can ask yourself these questions too. If you're in the midst of something hard, or even if you're not. The questions were, Will I let a victim mentality linger and define me? Or will I rise above, crafting resilience? and a higher level of dignity ultimately. What's the new picture of myself I want to create in order to direct my thoughts toward what I want instead of what I don't? Can I move forward while still honoring the pain, somehow integrating it into the fabric of my life, rather than revisiting it like a haunting echo the rest of my life? You might be able to relate, especially in Death of Loved One or tragedies. So, the power to choose has always been mine, even in the darkest moments. And guess what? It's yours, too. This, my friend, is the initial power move in conquering anything life throws your way. It's the initial power move to changing your thoughts to change your life. The power to choose, I think, is a life hack. And don't believe for a minute you don't have this power. Our minds and bodies persi excuse me. Our minds and bodies. Persist giving us what we resist. Our minds will keep us in the past unless we interrupt its processes and rise above all that pain and fear and make changes. Now, I am not making light of losses like death. I have been there. So many times. And I have been on my knees, and I have cried. I have just, it's, it's unbelievable. I can share these things with you precisely because I've walked through this and have come out the other side. But it took time, especially with loved ones. But every shred of self esteem that I own today is a hard earned badge. I'm one in the arena of triumph over these tragedies. To challenge my weak spirit, I had to put in the work to get brave. Every fear I faced, had on, without flinching, and that I conquered, and earned that strength. I hope, well, I hope you'll nod in agreement. The truth is, that resilience and strength. It's already within you too, and you've tapped into it before. This is really a hard balance my friends have been talking to. How do I tell some of these stories to make the points of some tools I use to overcome without having it be about me? That is not my intention, and this is not a sympathy ploy or anything. This is just the truth. And it might help. So, picture two tracks of life, right, running either side by side or like parallel narratives, or maybe like one on top of the other. I'm not sure how to describe it, but this all kicked off ages ago. But there was this really relentless, catastrophic path lurking in the background of my life that threw challenge after challenge at me. over and over again for almost 30 years. And yes, my family shared in the deaths as well, but I'm talking about a different track of continual tragedies that were just ridiculous. So meanwhile, there was the main track, where I was hustling hard to become somebody, like a relentless uphill climb with few resources and almost non existent support. I knew only one thing, that if I chose life, I would have to take action and find ways to change my thoughts. Because they were holding me back if I stayed in them too long. I had to figure out how to pick myself up and go from unfathomable circumstances and how to change my thoughts and habits, how to cure my low self-esteem, how to cure my anxiety and depression, how to face terrifying fears. Both the life-threatening kind and the psychological kinds. So picture this. Nights alone after work, a young girl age 19, working at a coveted job at an ad agency, lucky enough to get. Surrounded now, by her own thoughts, with nothing but Echoes of various tragedies in the background, with many more to come. But in these solitary moments, I faced critical decision because, guess what? Hopelessness and despair were consuming me, and I had to make a choice. Becoming my own cheerleader, well, I started first, jotting down phrases on paper, simple, yet powerful reminders, and it all started with this. Quote, you can do it. These simple little words were the beginning of erupting my otherwise pain filled brain and body. I began building around me a vortex of healing. My own thoughts, better thoughts. I began pretending or envisioning myself as though I was somebody. As though I already had a nice life with everything in it. Well, in reality, I did not. It was the, this though, was the start of something bigger than myself. I didn't know it then, but this was the beginning of my journey on the power of thought, the power of the subconscious mind, and the power of the body to create or manifest the future life that I desired. I didn't have the knowledge or formal training of all of this then. That came later. But I made the tough decision, the tough choice of healing by reshaping what and how I thought, how I thought about my thoughts even, and how I thought about my life, and what lie ahead. Taking charge of crafting my own future almost. With no one to talk to and no financial cushion, it felt like a stark choice between my future or my demise. But I chose life time and time again. It was hard. But I'm happy I did. Have to derail for a minute here. Now, have you ever been to this level of despair before? Where your life hinges on a really thin veil, somehow, between two worlds, life and death? You know, if you haven't, it isn't exactly what you might think it is. It's kind of weird, hard to describe. There's a space between that is real, and both choices are available at the same time. In that dark state of mind, it's, it's quite strange and difficult to describe, but I have faced it. I have felt it. I have tasted it. It was a more difficult space to discuss here than I can describe, but being in that dark place. offered me my choices straight away. And somehow I chose life over and over again. But I had to fight with myself in order to get there. Sometimes it was not easy. I don't know if you've ever felt this or not. Maybe not. Maybe you have. But with nothing but sheer determination to survive I started immersing myself in every positive thinking book. I sought inspiration from thought leaders of the day and delved into the wisdom of philosophers daily. It was a private journey. It was a relentless pursuit to change my thoughts so that I could change my mind and ultimately my life. I Found that by changing my thoughts, I could also change my mood. It surprised me. In my quest for a new belief system, something larger than myself, I also needed a beacon of hope, of positivity and energy, despite a strained relationship with God. At that point, I was filled with disappointment from him. I didn't turn to him much during that period. He had not really answered me much before. So instead, I tirelessly worked every day after work to rewire my brain and nurse my body back to health. But slowly new ideas and new excitement begin to emerge. Thinking bigger was also something I wanted to do as this moved on, but it was a real challenge. Because truth be told, I didn't believe in myself.. But what I did believe, was that my thoughts could create a new reality. I believed it because it was happening all around me with successful people. I wanted what they had. I wanted to try to create a new vision for myself that included financial abundance in all that life offers. But it was so difficult to get on that higher vision that it seemed my true soul could somehow see. But I wasn't there yet in my mind, you know, my human condition, I guess. At that particular time, I couldn't see levels that I wanted to see, because in my environment, there was a lack of role models close to me. Um, many who were just stuck in poverty consciousness, with no real dreams. The real magic happened for me though, when changing my thoughts, working on this every day, long before I even knew about affirmations, manifesting, and other transformative ideas. If you're feeling stuck in life, shifting your perspective is the first trick to get things moving. Like I said in Episode 2, it doesn't have to be hard. That part can be really quick. And I'm here to tell you, the power of this step is the real deal. So in my own journey, when serious events unfolded, and all I had were my thoughts and my journal, And I hope that there might be a force beyond myself, What I can attest to is that I surrender to the possibility of change, even though I didn't believe it. Even just when I would start feeling better, I swear to God, another tragedy would strike. And I'm just not talking about minor setbacks here. It just kept happening. If I could witness changes in myself under such extreme circumstances, for so long, like these two tracks of life running. I am so confident you can see positive shifts, even when things are relatively good. So, for those of you ready to tap into your power of thought, And you might think this is an old concept. Well, it isn't. There are some very simple techniques. If you grab a journal and notebook, carve out a few moments in your day, and start exploring, start changing, start first noticing, and then changing what you're thinking. There's a man named Ira Progoff. He's sort of a guru when it comes to journalizing or journaling. There's a lot of techniques to be learned with this that are powerful. And the impact of these techniques is amazing. Well, nothing short of sometimes miraculous. I actually later incorporated using his book called At a Journal Workshop. I'll try to remember to put that link for you. It's a pretty big book, but anyway, some of the associated exercises I used in my own weekend retreats much later when I began doing those. After my learning and healing modalities and I was teaching people how to manifest everything they want once I finally had these concepts. So, sometimes I often witnessed incredible shifts in people's lives and transformations that at times seemed almost unbelievable. In my own life, even at that time. The key, though, is doing the work, and from my perspective, it's not as challenging as it might seem, but then some parts are. This goes into the whole power of thought thing here, and let me go just a little further. There's a certain momentum that kicks in when you start taking genuine action to change your mind. The realm of this subject is really vast. And I could go on for, you know, hours and hours and days, but simple tools that have been my companions through various reinventions of my life whenever life took an unexpected turn. During some of those tragedies, the impact, ran so deep that sometimes functioning almost seemed impossible for weeks, sometimes even months. Because they were so serious and, and So sad. Particularly in those early days when my self esteem was at a low and fear gripped me in the face of everything and everyone. My first step was deciding to cultivate a new belief. That first decision, decision, was sometimes just the decision to survive. in those moments of hopelessness and despair when they loom large, demanding that I first navigate through finding the will to believe and then discover a path to rekindle things like hope. So, pretty early on, before I knew about the power of positive thinking and thoughts, I discovered some small books filled with inspirational quotes from philosophers and positive thinkers. It felt like I found my mental haven at that time. It was a safe place, a powerful place, a private place, a potent place. In those pages I read and memorized, used for momentary inspiration when emotions were getting the best of me. Why? To reframe my thinking. To reframe a new beginning. Surprisingly, reframing my dark mood to a hopeful one. I didn't know this was possible. in a state of depression, but that is all I had. There were no people or support system. I had to do this, and I'm telling you, you know, it may not solve everything, and if you are depressed and you need professional help, please get it. I also reached out for that too during some of these years. But these potent words that I read over and over and wrote them over and over began to change my thoughts and change my life. So what I found was by writing them, saying them, thinking them, focusing on them, they were like food, like nutrition, like fuel. It didn't take much for me, reading these materials, it became a daily ritual. So There was a point where I thought, what the heck, I've got nothing to lose by trying to see if I could trick my brain into believing more aspirational thoughts, even if they're not true. I wanted them to be true. I wanted to feel better. Despite the initial skepticism, I decided to focus in those directions because, lo and behold, when I did, I actually started to feel better. It was kind of weird. However, that relief was so often short lived as my mind had a tendency to revert right back to these negative thoughts. Tell me if you've ever felt any of these or different ones. My mind would tell me you are nothing and nobody. You are not good enough, you're not smart enough, you're ugly. You'll never make money in life. Everyone else has everything, but not you. I don't deserve. I'm a bad person. Nobody likes me. And the list goes on and on. I began my journey right where I was, although some of these were tougher than others to finally get through. It took a long time. But, usually in the throes of serious emotional pain over a life event, this became my nightly routine after work. Not much socializing or extravagant outings during this period of time, either, I was either at night school, working toward my college education, or another evening, studying, writing, thinking, you know, striving to improve my mindset somehow, to change my mind, because I hated how all that negativity felt. I already felt bad enough and it would just drain me, so I focused in these directions. So facing the, this, all these daunting tasks, I took, I took a bold step and wrote down every fear that I harbored. Every negative thought about myself and faced it. Every pessimistic notion I held about the world or my family. Especially my sister, who was just the brunt of many of these relentless tragedies. And anything lurking in my old belief system, and I kept facing them. It was very unpleasant. You know, and downright uncomfortable exercise. But deep down, I knew that unless I could uncover them, face them, these ugly aspects of myself, I wouldn't be able to identify the precise opposites of those to focus on in order to change my mind and beliefs. I tried then to change each one of them into their opposites. And began focusing on those instead. Writing them down, meditating on them, saying them out loud, interrupting patterns in my brain of the old to get to the new, so that they would become more of a habit than the old ones that were already a habit. I found myself on the brink of a breakthrough, almost there sometimes, until the next low vibrational catastrophe beyond my control would catapult me right back. And each time I'd plunge into despair, deep depression, and fear. However, with every one of these situations, I guess, as they continued to happen, gradually, and kind of magically, the thought of giving up diminished. And the pursuit of not just surviving, but learning to thrive gradually became more ingrained in my psyche over time. Now that didn't happen right away, but I knew this was working. Even though I didn't have a framework for it, I really did know it was beginning to work. Because I was also beginning to create bigger and bigger dreams and visions for my own future. And actually start to believe them, where I couldn't before. I felt my mind was starting to open up, and it was, to believe that I could have whatever I desired in life. This was really big progress. At the same time, I could start seeing new possibilities for myself. My determination and resilience quite naturally began somehow constructing themselves one brick at a time. The more I did this, the more I faced, the harder things were, the harder. I tried. So as this undertrack of my private world would crumble, the outer track where I was fervently clawing to make my way to achieve things in life, out there in the world, gained strength. and resilience and even new dreams. So, amidst the turmoil of depression and, let me also tell you, addiction within my family, particularly with my older sister, I embarked on an undergraduate degree in psychology because I was driven by a desire to comprehend the complexities of these issues It was during my academic journey that I encountered the work of Carl Jung and that's when the landscape of my inner world truly began to shift. You've all, we've all heard of Sigmund Freud, B. F. Skinner, but Carl Jung brought forth the concept of the shadow self. And this encompasses the ego, including our personality, but goes beyond that. The shadow self operates in the realm of the subconscious mind, often unbeknownst to us until we consciously engage in unraveling or embarking on a path of personal growth to make these changes. So I was captivated with these concepts because they lent credence to my power of thought ideas that I've been doing kind of on my own without understanding there was a greater context and base of knowledge out there to prove that this worked. From then on I continued my journey about learning, learning about the shadow self, the subconscious mind, the conscious mind, which led me into the whole manifesting realm, learning about that as well. Around the age of 20, I found myself on this personal growth trajectory, pretty early, that would remain a significant part of my life forever, and still is. I wanted to be, I wanted to be better. The question that intrigued me was, how does one tap into the subconscious mind and begin to alter these thought patterns? After all, this is where all those negative thoughts and beliefs I had accumulated were residing. This curiosity actually, did lead me to the practice of writing and saying aloud almost every day the opposite of what I believed. Sounds really simple and trite, but it really worked. It also involved, you know, like I said, crafting a new vision and a new version of myself that I wanted to become by putting myself in that situation as though it already was. And That new concept is now often referred to, as creating vision boards. I talked a little bit in episode 2 about creating a new vision for yourself. Nothing new there if you've been around personal development. You know, these aren't new concepts. But, they're still potent and powerful. hungered for knowledge. Yet, I was I would be gaining momentum when another catastrophic blow would strike that undertrack, too, I told you about. Shattering another part of my outer world, you know? Things that affected finances, disturbing my inner peace, you know, climbing back to achieve. So it felt like sort of a never ending cycle. The reason I'm sharing these kind of deeply personal things, isn't, isn't to share the story, but because I was fighting against these things, and I was beginning to win over them in spite of the pull. And so what I'm telling you is that I know these little techniques are really powerful and potent and there's more of them than this. For some mysterious reason, life presented me with one challenging opportunity after another, each that brought me to my knees. and thrusted me into survival mode, where I would be teetering on the edge of existence. It's only because of my choice to keep moving forward and growing and learning and maintaining curiosity that I'm actually still here today. Without that determination, I kind of doubt I would have made it. Was it, you know, was it all for some grander purpose, I wondered? Was there a spiritual reason for all the hardship that might someday be revealed? These are questions I pondered that led me to sort of mystical thinking, and a higher level of believing, looking at everything, because those types of thoughts made me feel better. I felt as though perhaps there was a higher order of things that I couldn't understand, but maybe, just maybe there was a purpose to all of this pain. I tried to use this in context as another tool when adding to my shifting thoughts and beliefs was beginning to create some powerful change in my life. With every fall, as I changed my mind and picked myself up again and changed my thoughts, I was also steadily constructing that higher level of resilience and strength. And even building a reservoir of courage, what I think of as a courage vault. So each time I navigated through the aftermath and restarted a new period, after the sadness, despair, the grief, and hopelessness, I was growing stronger. Everyone experiences the pain of losing someone close, but not everyone's core is repeatedly shaken by numerous other devastating situations, the kind that do shatter lives and force innocent people to piece their lives back together. Some of these situations were those. But, simultaneously, I was striving to make something of myself in my early jobs and later in business. When I shifted my focus to philosophy and embraced these techniques, instead of dwelling on the negative, and resisted allowing pessimism to govern me, a transformative shift would occur. And it was cool. There were times when I felt very much in control of these processes. Even in the midst of pain, I figured, though, the only thing I could control were my thoughts. So why not work to change my life? With that, it was free, and it made sense to me. Plus, I didn't want to be a drag to be around. There's nothing worse than being around a depressed, sad person who's like that all the time. I mean, we all have bouts of hardship in our lives, but, you know, some of these things were relentless, and I wasn't I've been real happy for a long time, but I didn't want to become that long term person. For sure knew I didn't want was falling into a victim mentality. Like a poor me, why me, boohoo, pessimism instead of optimism. I easily could have gone that way had I not continually interrupted those thought patterns and worked at it. There were times I might have fallen into that for a period of time. But, I had no interest in that becoming part of my actual soul, because to me, that's the least enjoyable type of person to be around, and I didn't want to be that. One that focused on their problems all the time, instead of looking at the great gifts they were given that we can bring to the world, if we try. You know, and having gratitude, even when things are bad. A gratitude journal and writing down three things a day became another very simple thing to do that was very powerful and potent and that surprised me in those early years. The turning point came when I could finally believe that I could earn more money, that I could be somebody. And it was then that I decided to test my fears and start putting myself really in front of things I was afraid of, that I'll talk about, but I started my computer training company with no resources, but it was a good idea. I'll chat about that on my business playlist a little bit. But, it was then that results started catapulting into higher realms than I had dreamed before. But let me be honest, I continued to struggle and fall backward and go forward again. When I sold my computer training company, I was about 32 years old. And from there I really decided to go on an even deeper quest for healing and personal growth because I wanted more and deeper levels of connection and learning. I never thought I'd be able to actually meet some of the authors in real life who helped me on my own early healing path, but I did. These next years would include hands on approaches. To healing my life and learning more about the power of thought and changing your mindset from experts, rather than relying on my soul journey by attending retreats all over the United States. I traveled and took Intensive retreats, workshops, from integrative breath work, to inner child work, to shadow retreats, to journalizing workshops, to manifesting retreats and workshops, even rebirthing sessions. Ooh, was that painful and terrible. Meditation retreats of many kinds and many times. Yoga retreats, fire walking, 30 day intensive shadow retreats. rope climbing, the pyramids of Giza in Egypt, Reiki healing, hands on healing, hypnosis, even past life regressions, talk therapy, art therapy, dream therapy, and more. And I even became certified in several of these modalities. I was on a mission to grow and heal and keep going. Every positive thing I could do. And I was led one by one, one by one, as I opened up. To the power of serendipity and manifesting my life. It got powerful and fun and in a flow like it never had before. Led by these powerful people of the day in those modalities, many of whom are still around right now. So, having a place of inspiration and clarity, I founded my second company, which was my inspirational workshop company, that led me to the four year motorhome journey where I was teaching and traveling, writing a book, developing my manifesting workshops and my own retreats, and developed my own guided meditation tapes. After learning how to harness the vibration of higher thought and achieve outer results in the world, some really profound serendipitous events happened that are hard to believe. Even for me today. I mean, there were some magical things, and I was kind of blown away, learning about, you know, quantum physics and the defi you know, These are real scientific things, in addition to spiritual things. I don't want to dwell on these Negative things but there was just then things were good Then there was just that next period the death of my dad at 61 means the suicide of my brother The deaths of my sister and my boyfriend and my pets were killed in my home by a raccoon that got through a window It was just like what is this stuff ever gonna stop? Stop. God. Really? And again, I'm not the only one in my family in pain over those events. My whole family is, and still. And we've all dealt with this grief, and suicide's a whole other subject that, you know. for another day, an addiction. These are not things for this video. My point here is positivity to get through. Once you process the pain, but the important thing is processing the pain is so important to get through these grief periods, but find ways for your own personal growth and come out stronger and happier after, after, later, when these these situations become part of our the fabric of our lives forever. So these past 10 years have been the best of my life. Finally, it's as though all the hard work, the growth, the healing, the education, the study culminated in growth of a new me, and I'm very excited. Even this past year, I lost my little home in Florida to Hurricane Ian, and That ended a chapter of friendship, and social, and being a snowbird, going, I mean, it was, it was not fun, and I'm still reeling from that. And then after six months after that, I lost my income. But you know what? These were hard, but because I know how to change my thinking I can move past them. So I've created this new vision for my future, which I'd like to do for the rest of my life now. And I'm just here to tell you that the skills I'm sharing in these podcasts are the culmination of a pretty vast knowledge base of experience and of me actually applying these things so that I can teach. I didn't set out to do anything but survive in the beginning you know, and try to become a better person originally. Because I didn't think much of myself. I now think, though, that perhaps all of these tragic events served a purpose in making me become the person I'm supposed to be, which, for me, is a teacher. All along, it's kind of, you know how we circle back to things in our childhood, which is part of, like, finding a passion and all? It's kind of still there. Well, And this is actually kind of funny, but while my older sister had a party pad with black lights and black Sabbath and bad behavior in the attic of our house, right down the hall, I had a school room in the dorm, whatever you call those, the, you know, the things that stick out in, you know, with, you know what I mean, little room, and I had a school room and I played school after school. Oh yeah. Yeah. I made my cousins and my sister be students. They hated it. I had student desk, teacher chalkboard, the pointers, the whole nine yards. I even spent my allowance on, uh, workbooks. Oh yeah, from Kmart. So, I was always interested in learning. Sometimes we go back to our original childhood dreams and find a way to bring them back to life, maybe even find a way to make a business out of them. As I've lately reinvented my body, my skin, my mind, my spirit, my career, I'm clearer and happier than ever in my 60s. If any of this video resonates with you, I'm happy about that. By continually working to change my thoughts and change my life, I have a Different and deeper interest in everything in life now. And I still use meditation to change my body, my cells, my mental health. I'm curious about so many subjects, aren't you? There's just a vast knowledge out there. I've forgiven the people of my past, even scary ones, and this has freed me too. I've got a love of learning and trying to learn new things and teach others how they might also find growth, or change, or effective ideas. So, don't ever give up, and I'm so happy to be here now, alive, to live another day, and I really sincerely can say this, I wish my brother could have caught himself and made that choice, and I wish my sister could have too. It is hell having lost half of your siblings to this kind of illness. That's very real, and I have a phone number for Suicide Hotline in, if you don't know, it's 988. Anybody, if you're watching this, or you know somebody, that might be teetering. That space I spoke about, it's possible to change out of that, because I have done it. So many times, and it was a fight, and I wished I could have gotten, had I known, had we all known what was going on behind the scenes with my siblings, I would have gladly lend a hand, but that's a whole other story. Reach out to somebody, if they're in any state like that, take it seriously. So I am just now in the early days of setting up this channel and podcast and I can go in several different directions and expand in areas of personal growth and development, spirituality and manifesting, business and health. Hey, if you're interested, I'd love to know your ideas and interests on things that I could make videos about that might help your journey in life, if any. I finally have excitement to continue on going even farther and reaching higher levels that I've got, I've yet to know, you know, because there's more, don't you have this too? So, would you come along this journey with me? To see how far this all goes, would you enjoy being one of my early followers Talking about some of these difficult subjects? Because you are very welcome here, and I would be honored to have you with me as I help inspire you and you help inspire me. You know, if what I've said sparks an idea for you, then I have achieved what I set out to do. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for making it to the end of this long story meant to show parts of myself and what I did to change my mind to change my life. I'll be preparing the next video for you, promising it'll be much lighter than this one, with punchy ideas. I love your subscribes, I love your comments. If you're on any of the podcast channels, I'm everywhere out there. I'd love your review too, but until next time Be grateful for your day Change those thoughts, change your mind, change your life. I'll see you in the next one.